Day three of not smoking. It's 1:37 a.m. and I've already been up for an hour...
I'm not looking forward to today at all. It's been said that the third day is the hardest - something about the body being in the last throes of the physical addiction. (Ever notice that nothing is ever in the first throes? It's always the final throes or the last throes...) It's an odd feeling - the heart races, I find myself holding my breath so I don't hyperventilate, odd shots of adreneline at strange times, my skin feels like it's crawling off me sometimes. I've even caught my eyes trying to cross every now and then. Strange little surges of anger at random times. Last time I quit smoking I had to find a completely new set of friends - I hope that doesn't happen this time!
On a completely unrelated topic - it looks like our 95+ temperatures are finished. We've been in the upper 90s or lower 100s for a few weeks now. With any luck I'll be able to get the bike out again! (Riding in this weather is like, oh, sitting in front of your TV watching the Travel Channel, holding a blow dryer in front of your face.) Tomorrow's high is 73. It's been weeks since I've been able to do any yardwork - it's just been too hot! So I mow tomorrow. Then I trim. Then I sweep. Then I mow again. (I have a reel mower. It's nice, but not the most efficient mower when the grass is long. Sometimes I gotta mow the same patch three times.)
It's now 2:05 a.m. - I've managed to fill 28 minutes without smoking. Only 22 more hours and I'm done with day three.
Slept a few hours - the cat snoozed on my feet. I just heard one of the dumbest things I've heard in a long time. I can understand banning smoking in SMALL restaurants, but New Jersey is trying to draw a new line in the sand. They're trying to fine people $250 for smoking in their own cars. To me, that's government intrusion at its worst. If they can prove, scientifically, that smoking in a car increases the chance of an accident, then fine - BAN CARS. Make 'em all drive Segways. Let's face it - as long as we all insist on driving cars, there will be those that insist on driving drunk or on a cell phone. One of my goofy little daydreams is to sit in a hydrogen powered fuel cell car reading a book whilst it tootles itself down an automated highway.
Having grown up in the midwest, I have ridden on mass transit systems five times in my life (not counting the school bus when I was a kid). A bus trip and two airplane trips for the military, a plane trip for a band, and an Amtrack trip for Boy Scouts. That makes me sad. I'm almost 40. Would I take advantage of mass transit? Not the way it is now in Sioux City... I would, though, if there was a bus or train to Omaha or Sioux Falls from here. At today's gas prices, it'd even make a certain amount of sense to take a bus to Omaha and hire a taxi to take you where you needed to go.
Well, that little rant distracted my nicotine-deprived brain for 20 minutes. I am REALLY looking forward to being a non-smoker, but the first few weeks are gonna suck. I thank God that Dagmar is being VERY patient and supportive. Of all the people, she's my favorite.
Almost halfway through day three. Of course, I cheated. No I didn't smoke a cigarette, but I didn't go to work either. Dagmar's home ill today, and, to be honest, I wouldn't be much good at work anyway. All I'm doing is staring at my computer, holding my breath, trying not to smoke, feeling my wisdom teeth grind, and trying telekinesis to move my my "bad" cholesterol into my toenails where it can't do any damage.
Dagmar told me this morning that she read somewhere that the average craving lasts thirty seconds. "Great," I replied. "But my cravings are only twenty seconds apart!"
The new low cholesterol diet seems to be going okay. Last night we had salad (with basalmic vinegar and olive oil - no dressing) with boiled chicken mixed in. I liked it. For breakfast we had oatmush with apple chunks, walnuts and organic maple syrup mixed in. I didn't like it so much. For lunch we had chicken mango wraps (whole grain tortillas) with red peppers and onions and stuff. I really liked that! Dagmar's in the kitchen right now messing around with some butterfly chops (fat removed) she's gonna bake somehow. Our refrigerator has never looked healthier. Dagmar keeps opening the fridge door and peering inside, proud of all the health food.
The no-smoking thing is still challenging, especially after a meal. I'm afraid to eat, to be honest, because the craving for a cigarette is so bad afterwards. So I'm holding my breath a lot... Tomorrow should be better. In an hour or two I'm gonna take a sleepy-pill and go to bed - maybe I can sleep it off.
My jaw is sore - the wisdom teeth are still bothering me. The dentist told me yesterday, "...if you were nineteen, I'd tell you to get them all pulled. But, at your age... Well, let's just see what happens..." So I'm teething, and I'm not happy about it. One of my bottom wisdom teeth is coming in sideways, which is pushing all my other teeth around. The other bottom one is coming up underneath one of my molars. That should be fun... The top ones are "erupting" already, but they seem to be coming in straight, anyway.
High cholesterol, quitting smoking, and wisdom teeth all in the same few days. Life's gonna be different. I don't think I'll have any problems with any of it, once I get through the next week or so without cigarettes and stop being twitchy and weird.